Sunday, October 20, 2013

Break time

TR.                                                                 QT

Gymnastics 4 hours per week.                      Gymnastics 1 hour per week
Cooking class- 1 hour per week.                   Art class 1 hour per week
Dance - 1 hour per week.                              Storytime 1 hour per week
Tennis lessons- 1 hour per week

The above is the kids' weekly schedule, my goal is to take both kids to the park for at least an hour each Friday. I want them to have that exhilarating free play, creative, imaginative play while they have the energy, freedom and desire to play.

QT's 1 hour of gymnastic overlaps with TR's class but 9 hours a week are for kid activities.  This time does not include drive time or prep time. QT and I usually go to a coffee shop for warm hot chocolate and then to the park before art or story time.  Art and storytime occur on separate days so, add an extra 4 hours for the pre-activity activities.

I still work. I run a business, I work in that business, I have people working for me.  I have to keep track of never ending pieces of paper.  I am trying to start a creative business and transition my life away from law. I have to wash clothes, make sure my kiddies feel loved and thought of.  I would love to resign and focus on my family, but I work for myself, resigning is more work.   I love the law, but not the paperwork.  I will have to  complete this post another time.  Thinking about all that I do made me need a nap.

I always tell myself I will not take on so much work.  I never listen.

I have been listening to the voice or god's spirit the first time.  It feels great to obey and not regret. This weekend the kids and I walked around the neighborhood.  I took a chain for dogs, since nutcases in the inner city love to have loose animals roaming.  

Duimg the walk my spirit said, take out your chain.  I took it out and put it on my shoulder.  We rounded a corner and saw a put bull being waled by a woman.  The pit tried to come toward us,  the woman pulled it back.  The chain helped me not panic.  In my head, I accepted the reality that I will fight a dog and kill it, before I kept it hurt my children.

On the walk back home, TR was skipping ahead.  The spirit told me to call her back.  I called her back and then looked to my left and saw a dog as big as  running to where she had been.  She never 
saw the dog.  When the dog saw me, it stopped.  I do not know the dog's intent but I know my desire to protect my babes is enormous. I had my chain and was ready to protect and defend. I saw tags on that dog, so it had an owner who let it loose.

  I really would prefer to walk with tranquilizer darts and use them on the animal and the owner. I should be able to take my kids on a neighborhood walk without seeing loose dogs.

Saturday, October 5, 2013

What's Cooking?

I cannot say for certain if I was traditional to begin with or if marriage, kids and age have pulled me in that direction. I don't know if I could have been pulled in the opposite direction or if I would have protested.
I know I designed my career with the expectation of having the flexibility to be home once married and after children. After having TR I was surprised to learn how much childcare was. I never investigated it or thought about it because I knew I would not need it. The cost in L.A. was equal to or moore than housing. I am amazed that regular people price childcare and then have a kid. I was determined to have a husband who thought it his duty to financially support his family, because I wanted to be able to be home. I knew to run from men who wanted the wife to work and fund expenses. So I think that meant I leaned traditional. I expected a mate who could allow me to stay home.
One day this week, I dropped TR off at school, arrived home and realized it was cold in the house. I started cooking food just to warm things up and I saw the impact it had on everyone. I get why people say and believe the kitchen is the heart and the hearth of the home.
When I was in school, kids would invite themselves to my house. Folks who I was not friends with would ask whomever was picking me up for a ride to my house. One girl lived around the corner and I would ask her if she wanted us to take her home. She declined in favor of my house. There was always food cooking at our house, it was warm, there was laughter and enough food for unexpected and uninvited guests.
While in high school, I went to the home of a classmate. Her house was beautiful. Her clothes were always beautiful. She was from the east so she had the best sweaters, I had nice sweaters too, but living in the bay, no one really had winter clothes. When we entered the girl's home, I recall it freezing. It was too cold to appreciate the house. She said she could not turn the heater on because her mother would know we had left school and come there.
While I was impressed by the shiny hardwood floors and designer furnishings, I was anxious to get back to the car and a heater. It seemed cool to me at that time, but as an adult I think I had it good to walk into a warm home each day, a freshly cooked pot of greens and family to greet me.
Now homes have heat and air on timers, so coming home to a cold house is not necessary and technology has offered relief from some time consuming tasks.
In our home we don't have a microwave. We pop popcorn the old fashioned way. We warm food in the oven. I appreciate what some tasks require because I think the effort adds value to the result. I am not able to throw food in a microwave so I have to plan. I think my life operates better when I plan as opposed to just responding to right now needs.
Hopefully my kiddies will enjoy their childhood and have fond memories of these early years and our time spent as a family. Now that TR is in full day kindergarten, it limits family time. When the kids were in L.A. with their nanny they were together and I would go most days to play and have lunch. QT tells me he misses TR when we drop her off at school. He gives her huge hugs when we pick her up from school.
QT is taking an art class. I figured it would be nice and allow him to interact with the same kids each week. He loved doing the art. Last week we used clay and he made some interesting pieces, one piece was a football. He scored the lines in it, which is good because I knew the shape but had no idea what the lines on a football looked like.
We had a parent teacher conference after the first quarter. TR is doing well and learning a lot. He does storytime at the library and park and we check out books each week. Before our art class or story time, we go to a coffee shop and he gets a yummy kid's hot chocolate with whip cream and I get a drink. We sit and chat and then take a walk. I have been enjoying it and he seems to enjoy it as well.
QT is a busy little boy and i am enjoying participating in his enjoyment of childhood..
At TR's school she gets to interact with the older kids, which she loves because she doesn't buy into the idea that 5 year olds friends need to be close in age. She gets to school and the 5th and 6th graders, call her name, they run to each other and hug her. The kids are allowed to hug (this is banned at some schools) TR loves to hug and her teacher hugs everyone, even me, each morning. TR's teacher say's TR gives her hugs when the teacher says small little nice comments.
TR loves school! Every parent I speak to say their kids love the school and does not want to leave school when it ends. I let TR stay late some days but the school charges, so we cannot pay that on top of tuition just so she can play and do crafts.
Today the kids and I met up with my father and my teenaged brother. the teen has been playing tennis since he was 6 yars old, so my father paid the coach to give TR lessons. my ids are busy so this means we will have to cancel cooking class. i would postpone tennis but when it's rainy season, she won't be able to play. She can cook later. Butat some point we will have to give some stuff up to take naps.