Art of Mother

In my advancing age I am appreciating the pleasures of the mothering/nurturing arts.

I want to provide my kiddies with a home of warmth and calm.

The kids were a bit under the weather this week and what they wanted most was to be held by me. I had to go to work 2 days this week and leave my sickly babies at home. They actually went to the park because they aren't down sick, they have a runny nose and a cough.

I told TR I was going to work and she told me that I don't go to work, that daddy goes to work. I like that she thinks I am home for her but I don't want her to think I don't work. She already thinks that daddy buys everything, because I rarely pull out payment for anything. I told her that I work at home but some days I have to work away from home. She told me that if I am going to work, they go to work with me.

She's sorta correct. I have taken them to work with me. The court in the Bay has a child care center and they have come to court and sat in. I've also taken them and the nanny when I have hearings in L.A.

She told me she would miss me. My mom tells me how she vividly remembers being 3 and recalls sitting in the yard listening to her grandmother and great aunt talking. She remembers all the places her grandmother took her. She reminds me of this when I'm looking at nursery schools because she thinks kids should be home at that age.

I remember being 3 and drawing conclusions based on what I knew and saw. I was 3, my brother was 4 and my sister was 5. I thought that girls would always be odd numbers and boys must be even number. I concluded on my next birthday I'd be 5.

I want the kids to know I love being home with them. I also want them to know that I work. I set my schedule so that I can spend the biggest part of my time with them.
I want them to know that mommy tries her hardest to be available to them.

I planned my professional life, so that one day when I had little kiddies, I could be home with them. I'm glad/thankful it worked out. I had no idea being a stay at home/work at home mom would not be simple. If I was forced to choose, I'd be a sahm. We'd just do our expensive activities at the Y for the low low price of whatever membership is. The money I'd make would not make up for the moments I love.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Now I am headed to the park.